Embracing Safety and Support: Reflections from My Panel Experience

In April, I had the privilege of sharing a part of my journey on a panel with the Survivor Empowerment and Advisory Council. This moment was significant for me, as it marked the culmination of years of effort to create a space where stories like mine can be heard and validated.

During our discussion, we explored the barriers that survivors face when sharing their stories. One major challenge is the profound shame and guilt that many survivors experience. This, combined with the painful reality of not always being believed, can make the process of sharing incredibly daunting. I’ve been fortunate to find individuals who believe and support me, but there are also those in my life with whom I am not ready to discuss my experience. This is not a reflection on them but rather a personal decision based on where I am in my healing journey.

Another barrier I've encountered is the pressure to disclose details about my situation when I’m not prepared to do so. I’m relatively open about my story now, but there are still people with whom I’m not ready to discuss it in detail. This choice is a part of my journey and is about my comfort and readiness.

Being surrounded by others who understand and share a similar bond created a safe and supportive environment. There is an unspoken bond between survivors—an understanding that transcends words and creates a unique sense of solidarity and safety. This experience highlighted a crucial lesson: regardless of the type of story being shared, the most important thing is to offer unwavering support and create a space where survivors feel safe and valued.

How to Support Survivors:

1. Believe Their Stories: Always stand by those who share their experiences. Your belief and support are crucial in their healing process.
2. Provide a Safe Space: Create environments where survivors feel secure and understood, especially when they choose to open up.
3. Respect Their Pace: Allow survivors to share their stories at their own pace. Avoid pressuring them to reveal more details or take actions they are not ready for, including making reports.
4. Understand the Challenges: Be aware that reporting or seeking medical care can be overwhelming and sometimes more distressing than the initial trauma.
5. Offer Support Without Judgment: Understand that survivors might not always be ready to talk about their experiences based on where they are in their healing journey. Offer support without questioning their choices or timing.

To all survivors: You are not alone. I believe you, I support you, and remember—it is not your fault.